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Hey hey. Goes by the name of Hana or Izzah.
I'm sad and I post depressing shit most of the times. Tt kinda makes you think, kinda makes you cry. Read with warning. Some have left behind tears.
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Monday, December 9, 2013 || Monday, December 09, 2013

All your faults to me, make you more beautiful..

As I lay down on this ragged up bed in this noisy house, I wonder to myself.. Why I haven't ran away from this broken and dirty place? All they do to me is touch me and destroy my innocence. 
I remembered 3 years ago when my father sold me to this rich guy, Mr Edwards, to clear of his debts. In return of selling me off, his debt was cleared. 
Obviously mom would disagree with this, but its a bummer she left us when she gave birth to me. 
Dad always blamed me for mom's death after that. I knew it wasn't entirely my fault, cuz I knew that while mom was pregnant, dad kept abusing her. 
When dad sold me of, I felt heartbroken. No one would love this girl with big blue eyes and pretty curls because this girl was dirty. 

Every morning I would wake Mr Edwards up and make him breakfast. When he goes to work, I have to do his laundry and clean up the house. And when he comes back to see the house not cleaned, he'll punish me in a way that a 14 year old shouldn't be punished. He would strip me of and abuse me sexually everywhere. 

I felt so dirty.. Even though he does this to me, I felt a more sense of hatred to my father who sold me off. If he was human, he wouldn't sell his own child to a perverted old man. I felt the world on my shoulder, I wanted someone to love me. I felt so lonely. 

The only friend I had was that guy I see at the supermarket almost every single day. I'm not boasting of anything, but he has an interest in me. 

One day, I'll make enough money and buy you off from that motherf*cker. I'm going to make you my wife and I will always love you. 
Was what he said.  

He was the only one who knew what was happening but neither of us had the balls to report about this sexual harrasment I've been getting every single day. Everyday, I would wait for Alex to get enough money to buy me off. He was so.. inspired. He was so keen to get me off this living hell, that I feel bad because I don't feel the same way about him. 
I know this sounds mean.. But I couldn't help it. That perverted old man has taken away all my emotions that I feel completely empty. 

One day.. I decided to tell Alex what's in my mind. 
Alex, I know you love me and all. But seeing you being so hardworking into getting money to get me out of this hell hurts me so much. Because I can't return you the love you are showing me.. I'm sorry, but all my emotions are trapped deep deep inside and I can't bare to see you hurt. I'm sorry.. but I shouldn't be such a burden.
And with that, I left him speechless. I ran away with tears in my eyes. I told him I don't feel a thing for him, but why is my heart stinging and aching? 

As I entered the house of hell,my heart sank. I couldn't take this living hell anymore. I wanted to run away,but I was so afraid of the risks. What if he finds me? And what would happen after he finds me? 
I wanted to run back to the supermarket to find Alex, but I knew it wouldn't be the best idea yet.. 
I laid back on my bed and went to sleep.. Forgetting the world.

4 years later // 

I got up from bed, scurrying to the ground floor to fix breakfast for my Master.(Mr Edwards) 
But he already went to work, so I just ate by myself.. still hurting. 
All he does is torture me. 
Isin't he human? 

I walked out the door to get the papers and there I saw a familiar face. 
That boy.. Alex..
He was smilling brightly at me, with flowers on hand. 
Remembered how before I didn't have feelings for him? Well, after I disappeared from his life, I started to realize how he means the world to me. But never have I ever stepped back to the supermarket to say hey.

He walked towards me slowly, and hugged me ever so tight. Never have I felt this warmth full of love and care for so long. As I stare into space, I saw a black sedan parked along the street and I knew.. That he was finally coming to get me. 

After that night.. you got me even more motivated to work harder and make more money. 
I quited my job at the supermarket and got a job at this huge ass building. Oh, they pay me good money allright.
I'm sorry I took so long to come and save you. 
I still love you and I know you love me too. I knew because they tears in your eyes were regretful that you said you wanted to leave me.
Now love.. Can I buy you off and love you forever? 
These beautiful words I heard from this man who worked his ass off for me.. 
As he hugged me once more, I cried as he kissed me softly. 

Story inspired by Dia Frampton's Walk Away.