Thursday, May 15, 2014

Unless...




This is that lie, of a smile, that kept telling people that I was fine. When I'm actually not. This was the smile, that I hated so much, because it doesn't go with my complicated life. 

Its sad how lonely it gets at times when everyone's on the phone talking to someone and I'm just there... Talking to no one, because everyone's too busy with their lovers. I miss the times where phones were a luxury and instead of playing games in the phone, we play games at playgrounds or at the void decks.
Instead of social media, we had to go out  and actually meet them up face to face. Sometimes, a part of me just want to burn every phone in the world because it is such a distraction. I'm saying this because I myself is guilty too.  

It really gets lonely sometimes and its sad to say that nothing fills up that big hole in my heart no matter how many friends i have or how many laughters per day. Its just aint the same anymore.. I wake up in the morning and there's no one sending me cute texts or texts that makes me have butterflies in my tummy. I dont get any texts at all. My phone's so empty and silent. 

Everyone's getting their lovers.. Where's mine? Dont bother telling me, " one day ." Or " your time will come." Because it doesnt. Its not a fairytale and its obvious on how no one wants this fat and ugly girl (despite how awesome she is.) the streets are filled with love and I have my own cloud of sadness and despair.

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