“naive. ”

July 2013 December 2013 January 2014 February 2014 April 2014 May 2014 June 2014 September 2014 October 2014 November 2014 December 2014 January 2015 February 2015 March 2015 June 2015 January 2016 May 2016 August 2016 September 2016 November 2016 January 2017 October 2018 November 2018 December 2018 January 2019 February 2019 April 2020 May 2020 December 2022 August 2023

Its like there's cancer in my blood. 
Its like there's water in my lungs. 
And I cant take another step.
Please tell me I am not undone. 

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The start of the day I felt restless.
No smiles, face emotionless.
Grew tired of crying,
I ask myself,
"Why am I still trying?"
I forced myself out of bed,
I felt the migraine in my head.
Why do I feel this way?
Why can't the pain just go away?
Mother tried to help.
Father adopted a whelp,
for me.
Because of a disease he suffered,
he died soon after,

I covered the tears with laughter.
The painful memories still lies within me,
as I sailed his ashes off to the sea.

There's so many things that can make me happy,
Dont know why, but i need to feel pain badly.
Everyone hated the way I am,
But I couldnt give a damn.
Even though their words sting my heart,
I told myself that they can't tear me apart.
It wasn't my fault I lost him,
They took him away from me, The Grimm.
I clutched my stomach tight,
as I remembered that unholy night.
Whereby I lost the child
and all I did was smile.